A "Toothy" Tale: In remembrance of the swallowed tooth

Weather-Talk With Sassy-Six

B:  Are you happy on a rainy day?
Me:  Sure, I can find many things to do.
B:  Are you happy on a sunny day?
Me:  Of course!
B:  Are you happy on a thundering day?  You can't watch TV because the thunder is LOUD!
Me:  Yes, there's a lot to do!
B:  Are you happy when it's thundering and lightening?
Me:  Yeah!  So, what are we getting at, here?

B:  Here's the worst part of all.  When it snows, when it rains, when it lightening's and thunders, all mixed together...(long pause).
Me: Yeah?
B: Okay, that's weird.
Me: What's weird?
B:  That you said you like those days all mixed together!

Hmmm...

Do you like it when it thunders on tuesdays, wednesdays, thursdays and fridays?

Hmmm...

Do you YES or NO?
Asher:  No sassies to my Mom.

Hmmm...

Me:  No, I don't like it if it thunders all those days.
B:  Do you like it if it's raining every day?
Me:  No.
B:  Do you like it if it's cloudy with gray clouds?  Do you Mom?  Do yoooooou?
Me: um, no.  Am I done?
B: Do you like it when it's partly cloudy and partly sunny?

The End.  I need a tylenol.

yes, i did start typing mid-convo.  some things just need to be recorded...and blogged.

Back to School :: Don't Blink!

This last week, I sent both my babies off to school, again.  I felt pretty prepared, but during the final days of summer, I thought of the things that we didn't get to, and wondered if I entertained them enough over the summer, if we'd done enough together?  You know, those sort of insecurities that come with being a mother?  But I was able to brush the doubt off rather quickly, and be happy for the fun that we did have--camping, a family reunion in Montana, we added quite a few new pets to our homestead, and had fun doing the little things like berry picking and making homemade ice cream.  

There was lots of bike riding, tending to our garden and harvesting and playing outdoors with friends.  Summer was good, relaxed and enjoyed, for sure.

My Brooklynn loves school.  With that, it sure makes sending her off onto the school bus that much easier.  I didn't have to do what I did last year, because I was confident in her confidence.  When she came home after her first full day of school, we asked what she thought, and she said, "I think I was gone for maybe, two hours?"  

It was actually about 7.5 hours and I felt it.  It was a long time, and by the end of the week, I was missing her, a lot.

A whole lot changes in just one year!

Then there's my sweet rascal, Asher.

Woah.  He was a baby last year!  Now, he means serious boy-business.  

And to second what I'm saying, he's been taking naps lately.  He didn't even do that at two!  He's growing into such a funny, sweet, imaginative, happy little boy, who needs more rest these days to keep up with the adventure within him. Now I just need to accumulate the same pictures of him on his first days!

He also loves a good fohawk and wearing happy birthday stickers on his first day of school.

He makes me smile.

They make me smile.

Hope all you mamas are having a happy beginning to your school year!

Snow Days

It has been snowing off and on for the last three days and we're doing our best to enjoy this rare occasion!  Hope you're keeping warm!

Most Embarrassing Moment {Christmas Church Service Edition}

Yesterday, the kids and I went to church after having missed a few weeks due to the bazaar.  Husband wasn't able to come with us as he was busy with a list of obligations, so on our way we went--the three of us.  I signed the kids into their classrooms, hardly paid any notice to the halos and wings being passed out in Brooklynn's class and headed up the back stairs to the sanctuary.  We usually sit in the top of the auditorium near the center.  I told Husband a few months ago that we should move up front, and he responded, you could move up front.  So in the back center is where we sit.

Oh, it was nice to finally be at church.  I sat down, relieved to be free from the everyday noise and demands.  About the time I was settling in for some holiday reflection, our pastor got up and welcomed everyone saying, "who's here to see a child today?"  Suddenly, flashes of wings and halos and the children pastor's chic black blazer and heels all came together.  In about one minute the Christmas program was beginning and my kids hadn't a lick of what to do, dance or sing, and they're wearing near play clothes and tennis shoes.

I sprang out of my seat, ditched my purse and hurried to save my family.  There I found the children's pastor dolled up, like I'd previously noticed, guiding a line of 30+ 3-4 year olds, including Asher, wearing fabric tied around his head like a little shepherd boy.  He looked surprisingly thrilled with what was about to take place.  When I explained to another teacher that I didn't know if he should take part in today's performance, since he hadn't ever been to practice, she said, "oh, none of the little kids know what they're doing; they'll just stand there and look cute."  Easy enough, I guess that'll do, I thought.

I went to find Brooklynn and when I found her in stretch pants and wings, I asked her point blank, You want to sit this one out since you haven't practiced, or do you want to do this?  There is a fine line when telling your child he or she can't take part in a children's activity when all of the other humans under the age of 10 are doing it, so I let her decide, and she said yes.

I held my breath as I went back to my seat and for the next ten minutes while the big kids performed.  Then it was the younger kids' turn.  Brooklynn was the first kindergartner to take the stage.  The sight of her salmon colored top made me cringe a little as the rest of the kids came on stage in their black and red performance dress.  Then the little kids came on stage lining in front of the other kids and there was Asher in his bright yellow flannel and black and yellow Nike's, dead front and center, without a clue why he was up there.

I think I slumped in my seat a little.  When the music began it was sweet.  Seventy-five or more kids singing Christmas songs in their ununison harmonies.  Then our sweet, sweet Asher decided to that since he didn't know what to do, he would do his own thing, in his yellow shirt, dead front and center. 

I should have known. 

He stomped his feet, did twirls, moved back and forth from the edge of the stage, walked around (with another boy who lost his head piece and was acting like a ghost) and bent over kicking his feet in the air. 

PROOF: 

Look for the ball of yellow in the front
(sorry for the horribly scratched lens).

There was plenty of laughter, as Asher and his ghost-friend distracted in the front.  I overheard one guy in front of me refer to Asher and his break dancing moves, while I exchanged smiling glances with the lady next to me, who had no idea I was the mother of the boy in yellow.  With my hand on my brow, I sunk a little deeper into my seat.  When the final song was over, they asked all the parents take a few moments with their kids to take pictures, etc.  It felt as though the entire time I was walking to the stage to greet my bright yellow ball of moves that people wondered, who could be this kids' parents? 

Outcome: a smiling, happy Asher and Brooklynn. 

Me: embarrassed and shocked at the way service turned out, yet proud of my happy and adaptable children?

Asher said: "that was a fun sheep show!" 

Brooklynn said: "I was a little nervous, but not like last year."  I guess that's how it goes when you don't have time to get nervous!

Never a dull moment with children.

x

Once upon a time, there was a heart-shaped tree...

Months ago, I spotted this chopped tree trunk in the far end of the yard. 

Giddy, is just one word that describes the way I felt
when happening upon this natural treasure. 

Oh, the many things that I've considered doing with this piece of tree! 

Cake platters, wall art, a photo prop for an impromtu photo session...

Love, in the most peculiar of places.

P.S. I'm still trying to figure out how the crayons and hair brush ended up outside,

and in case you were wondering about the pink shoes...that happens every so often.

P.P.S. The murder mystery party was a hit! 

Once I get my hands on the pictures, I'll share more about it!

xx

That Time I Spied on My Kid

The other day, Brooklynn said,

"Why do I get a smile on my face every time I see a school bus?"

Brooklynn's first day of kindergarten

As you know, from my pre-first-day-of-school-post, I was a bit of a wreck at the thought of sending my five year old away for four hours a day, with kids and adults I don't know, to a new place, and to be picked up and dropped off without my assistance and hawk eyes.

Naturally, I followed the school bus on the first day. Never mind she told me not to when I spoke of my plans. I debated her wishes and my gut feelings until that school bus picked her up. Then two seconds after the bus pulled up that hill, all crumbled and Asher talked me into following the school bus. 

For the first time in my motherhood, I felt like a stalker. My plans were to follow the bus and drive around the parking lot and watch Brooklynn walk across the courtyard and make it to the right building. When I couldn't see squat, and the tiny lot screamed accident waiting to happen if you plan to spy on your kid while driving, I parked, grabbed Asher, and headed for her building.

Parents were scattered about, some taking pictures of their group of kids atop the school sign, one child crying outside a classroom, and recess happening. When I saw her rainbow pen-striped backpack against the wall outside her classroom, I knew she was where she needed to be. Relieved and well, I decided to have one more glance at my girl on her first day of school.

I walked out to the yard, scanning the playground and the lawn for Brooklynn in her pink coat. With tiny kids and big kids running rampantly, I had to look harder. Just about the times I squinted my eyes, I found her, on the concrete attempting some solo hula-hoop fun. And it was just about that time that the bell rang and I told myself my work had been done and I could quietly leave without her ever knowing I followed her.

But after the bell rang, she kept at it. Then the playground aid called "all toys need to be put away and you need to line up at your classrooms," but Brooklynn didn't flinch and she kept working on her rhythmic hip-sways. I watched her for another 15 seconds to see if she planned on listening on her first day of school, and then I had no choice but to intervene.

She was surprised, asked how I got there, and feeling a bit creepy myself, I played it off, pointing to all the other parents outside the classroom. Asher and I watched as she lined up, and listened to her teacher begin what would be the tone she'll use with 25+ five and six year olds for the rest of the year.

As the line of children headed for the door, we waved good bye and she smiled excitedly. Aching a little for the boy who clung to his mother as his father stood watching, I grabbed Asher's hand and headed for the car.

She's in good hands, I thought, and it's exactly where she wants to be.

And, you know, sometimes spying settles an anxious heart, and your five year old wont hold it against you.

Fierce Love and Losing Control.

I shared this in 2010, but today, as I send my five year old up the steps of that yellow school bus, to ride to her first day of kindergarten, it means more.  I'll admit, I'm a bit of a wreck.  So much, that I'll be waiting at school for that yellow school bus and will take her hand and lead her into class.  I was a wreck yesterday and last night, too, as my heart has been worrying about her growing up too fast and becoming part of 'the world'.  I feel like I'm losing some control and I'm not sure I want to hand the small amount of control I have, over to strangers.

I'm just going to press in and know that God's got her covered.  I know He does.

Sending all you parents out there warm thoughts during this back to school season!

The Ache Will Always Be Okay

There were various times while I was pregnant with my daughter, when the nerves would rise up and a heaviness would fall on my heart.  Bringing new life into this aged and spiraling world is a dive into the deep.  I've done the same with my son, but it is a different sort of ache.  He's a warrior of sorts, while my daughter carries a heart that I know is growing similar to min--fragile, contemplative, and yearning.

There were times when I ached for her as I sat in my rocking chair full-bellied, for the trials that I know will meet her in this life.  As a mother, deep down, I continue to ache.

I ache for the times when heaviness meets her in the morning; when her heart feels like it has torn and will never heal, when for a moment, disappointment will overshadow the dream, and when it'll take everything in her to get back up again.

I ache for the friendships that will take their plight, and for the struggle that is had while uncovering true friendship.  I ache for the times she'll feel misunderstood by me, or her father, friends or others, and for the ones her heart breaks, because their happiness, she carries in her heart.

I ache for times when the page turns, the chapter closes, and when the book slams shut, because I know, she'll feel lost in her own story.

I ache for the people who will come into her life and the ones that will go, and for the times it'll take everything in her to severe her ties and walk away, because she knows it is the right decision. 

I ache for the process she'll have learning self-respect and self-love, because often, it's hindsight that teaches the hardest and greatest lessons. 

But with the ache comes happiness, I know this through and through. 

If it weren't for that deep dive, I'd be sitting on the bank, kicking up water with my toes, never fully drenched in the fullness of the sea.  I'd never know ache, and I'd never know happiness.  I'd never know fear, and never know peace.  I'd never know the feeling of being alone or the feeling of love.  I'd never know the questions...or have faith. It would be a life without feeling, and that's not the sort of life I've agreed to live.

So I tell you, Brooklynn, embrace the ache when it finds you, and during the times it feels it wont subside and when it wakes you at 2am heavy-hearted and sad.  Turn on your lamp on your bedside table and take that journal into your hands and pour down onto that page; let the words write themselves and know that you are okay.  Pray.  Read The Word.  Read Rilke.

The ache will always be okay.   

Photo of Brooklynn lying on the lawn, Summer 2011

Backyard Treasure Hunt

Last weekend, while Husband's friend, Rickey, was here hanging with Husband, he treated our little ones to a backyard treasure hunt.  After exciting them with the idea, he asked them to help him draw a map of their proposed hunt.  Then he sent them on their way for proper shoes and coats, and of course a basket for their treasures.  After helping Asher tie his shoe, I overheard Rickey explain when Asher asked for a lift, that "each person had to make their own way." 

Husband and I smiled as we watched his hunting partner and friend from teenage years walk around the edge of the property with our two small ones, each fully invested in their "hunt."  When they returned, nearly forty-five minutes later, their basket was full of hunted treasures--treasures even I was surprised were scattered about the property.

They found a plethora of earthly finds,

and a candle...?

and what Husband called a "jarred Ecosystem...?"

I'm not sure who was eating pickles by candle-light in the trees or when...

but the treasures kept them enthralled for some time.

Thank you Rickey for showing our kids how to have a true backyard adventure!

I may have to set out on a treasure hunt of my own to see what other non-earthly things are hiding in the trees.  However, I did watch a coyote trot across the yard the other morning, and I have found a set of animal teeth and bones on the lawn.  Hmm...maybe I'll keep the treasure hunts to indoors!  I'm still looking for my planner and a few other items since the move!